Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule as team owner/coach to join us again for the induction of our third Hall of Fame member. Today's inductee has been considered by some as the greatest receiver to ever play in the NFL, which this man has argued himself. This man was unquestionably the best at his position when he was on his game but there is still some feelings of "what might have been" when we reflect on his entire football career. He was like no receiver before him and it's going to be hard to find someone in the future with the breakneck straightaway speed and soft hands that this man had. He was someone you had to keep an eye on at all times and when you saw the QB cock his arm to throw it deep, you knew he was probably looking at this man's direction. More often than not, this man made a play for a big gain and now he's the latest member to gain membership into the D12 Hall of Fame. this man's name is Randy Moss.
Moss entered the NFL and D12 with plenty of baggage but owners were usually rewarded with the on-field production that came with the continual insubordination. Moss played in two seasons before the Dirty Dozen was established and if we included the 2,726 yards and 28 touchdowns he scored during those years, he would be the unquestioned #1 receiver in league history. Moss had a skillset unfamiliar to defensive coordinators as no matter how far back their corners and safties played throughout the game, Randy would always get behind them. Moss also had the ability to take a slant pass and turbo past the entire defense if you gave him too much cushion. Unless you were playing against him, one of the greatest sights was to see Moss throw up his right arm mid-route (half the time with the defender still in front of him) because Moss knew all he needed was about 1/2 of a step to get open deep and haul in another touchdown pass.
In his 11 years in our fantasy league, Moss was the #1 ranked receiver three times and was in the top five six times. Moss's best season was in 2007 with J.P. when he scored 23 touchdowns and accumulated a record high 287 fantasy points as a receiver in his first season with New England. Chris Marvel couldn't shy away from Moss's incredible game changing potential as he put Randy on his roster five separate seasons with varying results. Much like Terrell Owens, Randy Moss was known to open his mouth and piss off a lot of decision makers and that made for some really brutal seasons on the field and some headaches off of it. The dark side of trusting Moss was in full effect for Chris during his time in Oakland in '05 and '06 when Moss was on a bad team and had a bad attitude, which resulted in a couple of dark seasons for both Moss and Marvel. In the big picture, there's no question that Moss was one of the best fantasy players we've ever watched and he also made the quarterbacks on his NFL team such as Daunte Culpepper and Tom Brady, enjoy career years. Every defensive player and fantasy owner kept one eye on Moss at all times and he was a player that would inevitably be on a few highlight reels each and every Sunday night.
In his 11 years in our fantasy league, Moss was the #1 ranked receiver three times and was in the top five six times. Moss's best season was in 2007 with J.P. when he scored 23 touchdowns and accumulated a record high 287 fantasy points as a receiver in his first season with New England. Chris Marvel couldn't shy away from Moss's incredible game changing potential as he put Randy on his roster five separate seasons with varying results. Much like Terrell Owens, Randy Moss was known to open his mouth and piss off a lot of decision makers and that made for some really brutal seasons on the field and some headaches off of it. The dark side of trusting Moss was in full effect for Chris during his time in Oakland in '05 and '06 when Moss was on a bad team and had a bad attitude, which resulted in a couple of dark seasons for both Moss and Marvel. In the big picture, there's no question that Moss was one of the best fantasy players we've ever watched and he also made the quarterbacks on his NFL team such as Daunte Culpepper and Tom Brady, enjoy career years. Every defensive player and fantasy owner kept one eye on Moss at all times and he was a player that would inevitably be on a few highlight reels each and every Sunday night.
Some of Randy's boom and bust seasons are on display in his trophy case he he won the 2007 and 2009 Rod Smith awards for our league's top receiver for J.P. and Chris respectively. Moss would've won it in 2000 and 2003 if that award was available. Moss also won Marvel a Bust of the Year trophy in 2010, which was his final and most depressing season in our league. Moss was on J.P.'s 2004 championship team, which represents Randy's lone D12 championship season. This man liked to talk and loved to catch flying objects so I'm going to throw Randy the mic and let him start talking.
[The commish literally throws the mic at Moss, who catches it and scowls at the commish.
The instinct to hit Jerome over the head with the microphone slowly starts to melt away, Randy composes himself, and puts the mic to his mouth to begin speaking]
Thank you very little, commish for that unexpected throw. Haven't seen a wounded duck like that since my days in Oakland with Andrew Walter. [Audience checks phones to google Andrew Walter] I'm here today to celebrate my time in y'alls little fantasy league, which I'm told is one of the, if not the most, premiere league in America. I want to say with pride that I don't pay no mind to stats and numbers, which is why I think you all need to do something a little more with your lives on Sunday than cheering for players to score you points. That aside, I want to first and foremost thank Chris Marvel for giving me a chance in the Dirty Dozen. Much like Dennis Green, you were one of the few coaches willing to take a chance on me and your repeated faith in me will never be lost on Randy Moss, believe that. I'd like to apologize for some seasons where we went through some adversity together, too. Crazy Randy would personally like to apologize for that mess. I'd like to give my love to J.P. diZerega who allowed me the opportunity to win a Granger Cup and to be apart of his fantasy football dynasty during that time. J.P., what a season we enjoyed together in 2006, when I would basically get loose for a score once a half for you and averaged almost 18 fantasy points a game for you, the most ever by a receiver. And to John Vedra, I ain't got much to say about our time in 2001 together except for the fact that you wore some sweet sweaters while cheering for me on your couch in Rams Village. We all go back like my cornrows and I hope you all had fun going through the highs and lows of my career together.
Thanks for this honor of being the third member of your little Hall of Fame. Y'all really have a Hall of Fame for a fantasy football league? Goddamn, you white boys are on the computer too damn much. It's time for me to get on outta here and run a nine route to the party room to get my drink and smoke on. Best believe I'll be burning some blunts down all night until there ain't no trees to be smoked. Straight ash, homie.
[The commish literally throws the mic at Moss, who catches it and scowls at the commish.
The instinct to hit Jerome over the head with the microphone slowly starts to melt away, Randy composes himself, and puts the mic to his mouth to begin speaking]
Thank you very little, commish for that unexpected throw. Haven't seen a wounded duck like that since my days in Oakland with Andrew Walter. [Audience checks phones to google Andrew Walter] I'm here today to celebrate my time in y'alls little fantasy league, which I'm told is one of the, if not the most, premiere league in America. I want to say with pride that I don't pay no mind to stats and numbers, which is why I think you all need to do something a little more with your lives on Sunday than cheering for players to score you points. That aside, I want to first and foremost thank Chris Marvel for giving me a chance in the Dirty Dozen. Much like Dennis Green, you were one of the few coaches willing to take a chance on me and your repeated faith in me will never be lost on Randy Moss, believe that. I'd like to apologize for some seasons where we went through some adversity together, too. Crazy Randy would personally like to apologize for that mess. I'd like to give my love to J.P. diZerega who allowed me the opportunity to win a Granger Cup and to be apart of his fantasy football dynasty during that time. J.P., what a season we enjoyed together in 2006, when I would basically get loose for a score once a half for you and averaged almost 18 fantasy points a game for you, the most ever by a receiver. And to John Vedra, I ain't got much to say about our time in 2001 together except for the fact that you wore some sweet sweaters while cheering for me on your couch in Rams Village. We all go back like my cornrows and I hope you all had fun going through the highs and lows of my career together.
Thanks for this honor of being the third member of your little Hall of Fame. Y'all really have a Hall of Fame for a fantasy football league? Goddamn, you white boys are on the computer too damn much. It's time for me to get on outta here and run a nine route to the party room to get my drink and smoke on. Best believe I'll be burning some blunts down all night until there ain't no trees to be smoked. Straight ash, homie.